Pastoral Discernment and Gal. 3:28 (or Ministry and Dying Women)

One of the problems many ministers face is the struggle of pastoral discernment. My grandfather would have used different language. He likely would have wanted to talk about expediency, but the thought was fairly similar though with some variant nuances.

Over the past week I have been forced to engage my thinking on pastoral discernment. It is a problem that many young ministers have when they leave the safe haven of open thinking that is seminary and head to the hallowed halls of the church. Now, the conversation becomes different, and of different import. The former was primarily a danger of the burgeoning young theologian's own soul and spiritual vitality; the latter about the spiritual health of a flock of people who the minister has been called to nurture, to mentor, to console, and to challenge. Some of these different functions come clear in the metaphors we use for ministers/church leaders: shepherd, spiritual director, teacher, guide, prophet. (Willimon has done some wonderful reflection on these and other ministerial roles in Pastor, his theology of ministry.)

Let me get to the point, at which I only hinted yesterday. I am a feminist by nature and training. I have seen too many women's lives that have been scarred by the men of the church. Often, women feel as though they are mere shadows in the Christian world, nameless, faceless, unable to speak. (I realize that there are other women who find this idea enigmatic and simply PC, but that is different, though still incredibly authentic, experience in a faith journey.) Theologically, I have been on a long road of formation that has brought me to understand that our God is the God who is always doing new and surprising things, the God of new creation who through baptism transforms us to tear down the dividing walls that have been established by the world so that there is “no longer Jew or Greek, there is no longer slave or free, there is no longer male and female” (Gal. 3:28). I long for women to rediscover the church as a safe haven for the thoughtful expression of their spiritual journeys and their faith formation, where they can come not merely to grow on the margins of our communities, but to be a shaping force of growth and transformation for others.

But, I serve at a very diverse church. Theological we are across the spectrum. So, I come to the question of pastoral discernment. My grandfather would have asked, “What is expedient here?” I, trying however clumsily to follow in the shoes of such a spiritual giant, ask the question, “When is the right time to broach such a serious question to a people so divided?” (I was actually called a hypocrite last night by someone who feels that I should simply proclaim what I believe from the rafters and the pulpit. I think this approach is naïve and fraught with problems that come when there is no discernment, but these words were coming from a woman who constantly struggles with the reality of wearing a scarlet W on her chest in the community of faith, for she is a marginalized woman.)

There is no easy answer to the question. In fact, there rarely are in matters of such deep spiritual import. I simply pray that I will have the courage and the wisdom to walk the tightrope of sensitivity between those who are more conservative and have not been on the same spiritual/theological journey as me on the one hand and those who desperately crave the wholeness in Christ that they feel has been withheld from them by the church on the other.

Note: I was on a role with this little piece until the morning picked up. Then I was forced to finish these thoughts in the midst of two unexpected visitors and several phone calls. Sorry if some of it is incoherent. I will try to go back and proof it, but right now I need to post and get to other things on my “to do” list.