[This is the homily from a wedding Natalie and I got to officiate together a few weeks ago.
Our text for the day was Philippians 2:1-15.]
EM:
Well, here we are. It took distant cafeteria glances, some dodge ball mayhem, and a little Strawberry Jam to get the ball rolling, but we’ve made it here. You’ve tested your relationship through the heart of long, cold Michigan winters and in the heat of the west Texas desert. There was no single moment of a grand "Explosion in the Sky," just small but brilliant moments woven together to bring us to this day where you can look at each other and say, I long to have “Your Hand in Mine.” And now today is finally here. J, it just might be the GDE, the “greatest day ever.” It probably seems like you are a long way from the Taekwondo dojo and the dance studio, from talking art and music with friends and from singing with musical groups, but you’re here.
You are joined today by people who love you, who have come to celebrate with you and share in this covenant and who by their own presence promise to help you honor one another and keep the vows you are making today.
J, you’ve spent plenty of nights at our house, gathering with the “Thank Gorlad It’s Friday” gang to dive deeply in the mysteries of friendship and life and faith. We’ve watched you grow deeper in love with God and wrestle to discern the direction of your life with the support of godly friends and mentors. These were holy moments, moments shaped by the fellowship of the Spirit.
E, We’ve seen the deep love and care and concern you have for your family… We’ve watched you selflessly set aside your own preferences, plans, and prerogatives to support your friends. When they’ve been in desperate need of someone to listen and understand, you’ve poured out the love and consolation of God into their lives. These were holy moments, moments shaped by the fellowship of the Spirit.
Together you’ve been shaped by the love and support of old and new friends, of your families, and of communities of faith that have walked with you as you figured out how to prepare for this day and for a lifetime together…. These were holy moments, moments shaped by the fellowship of the Spirit.
I think that this is one of the reasons I love the way Paul starts the beginning of today’s passage. “If you have any…” “If you have any encouragement, any solace, any fellowship…” “If you have any…” I’m convinced that Paul isn’t doubting the bonds he shares with the Philippian Christian community. I definitely do not think he is questioning their common experience of being “in Christ.” In fact, I think it’s much the opposite. Paul is confident that this is safe ground for him to walk on. He is certain that they’ve drunk deeply of the goodness of life in Christ, that they’ve started faithfully on this journey, that they’ve tasted the sweetness of benefits and blessings of life together with one another in the Lord.
So Paul daringly begins,
If Christ is any encouragement to you at all… and of course he is!
If you’ve experienced the solace of love… and of course you have!
If the Spirit has enabled and empowered your fellowship with one another… and of course she has!
If God’s compassion and mercy have encountered you… and of course they have!
And as that community hears these words read, they look around at the other faces in that little house church and memories begin to flood their minds, memories of times when they’ve encountered Christ, when they’ve shared together in the compassion and mercy of God, when they’ve fellowshipped deeply in God’s Spirit. And just like that little church, you can look at the faces around this room, and as you look, you begin to remember some amazing stories. And so, like Paul, we confidently affirm today that you’ve experienced this type of life, you’ve tasted the reality of this beautiful unity in God.
NM:
This unity does not happen on its own. It takes effort. We are to go about participating in life with God with such intent that we engage each day, as Paul later says, “with fear and trembling.” This text demonstrates the seriousness with which Jesus took his calling. He chose to empty himself to a degree beyond what we can imagine.
So if we are to have the same mind as Christ, if we are to embody the pattern he has set forth, what does it look like? I believe Paul offers us the starting point…of our relationships with others. We are not to be driven by our selfishness and arrogance. To borrow a bit of language from another text, we are to “clothe ourselves” in humility and see others as better than ourselves. Rather than looking after our own interests, we are to discern the interests of others and restlessly pursue just that.
Marriage…seems like a natural opportunity to learn how to step into this passage. Now, I recognize that today you have nothing but positive and loving feelings for one another, so what I am saying does not seem like this is really all that difficult. But there will be a day, soon enough, when your selfishness seems to come out of nowhere! If you are anything like us, which I suspect you are since you’re human, you will have many occasions in the years to come where letting go of yourself for the other is the last thing you want to do; when you won’t really feel more love for the other than you do for yourself. (For us I think it hit on about day three!)
So as you begin your lives together, make it your goal to live out this kind of love more and more each day. Seek to let go when you feel yourself frantically trying to manipulate and get your way. Strive to love one another in the self-emptying manner that you each has felt and received from Christ.
EM:
This could be a bit overwhelming, especially in the toughest of moments, when everything inside of you is fighting the call to empty yourself, when the temptation for self-preservation and looking out for your own interest seems too strong to avoid. But don’t despair for you are never doing it alone. (Don’t analyze, calculate, and over-think it all.) In fact, you can give of yourselves with reckless abandon. As you move more fully into the life of the triune God together, as you give of yourself and work out this salvation, God is working in you, partnering with you, pouring God’s own life into you…
We remember that Christ’s death on the cross wasn’t the final word. It was a surprising moment of revealing both the heart and the strange economy of God. So you can always understand your own lives in God’s economy, in which God is constantly working, empowering, redeeming, and resurrecting things according to God’s ultimate purposes. You can give of yourselves freely to one another because you affirm God’s continued care and activity in your own lives and you trust in the surprising and grace-filled work of God that is continually breaking in all around you.
It is that very power of God that will empower you to live for each other out of the super-abundance of love, rather than out of lack. And as you partner with God for one another’s sake, you can also be sure that God is making you holy!
NM:
J and E, although this day is very much about the two of you, it is really about God who has brought you together and who will sustain you. It is about bearing witness to the world of a self-emptying love that only comes from God. In this kind of love, you will certainly stand out; As Paul says, you will shine like stars in, an extremely dark world. People will be drawn to the awe-inspiring love of the Trinity that is lived out between you.
And not only are you to seek to embody this passage with one another, but you are to extend love to all people, even the unlovable…the annoying...the enemy. E, you are to love those patients who are incredibly mean to you. J you are to love those classmates and authors who think a bit more highly of themselves than they ought. And as you move into your first home together, you are to seek ways of extending love and hospitality to neighbors who may drastically differ from you.
So in light of the ways that you will reflect the love of God in your own relationship and in interactions with others, I believe it is symbolic that you are facing the audience as you make this covenant today. As you remember this day in years to come, I hope that you will recall that your very orientation right now represents the outward aspect of your relationship. I pray that the self-emptying love that God gives you for one another will not be kept just for yourselves but that you will seek to join God’s work of redemption in the world and tirelessly pour love out on all whom you encounter.
So now, facing outward before this wonderful crowd of family and friends, you have the opportunity to exchange the vows that you have written for one another and for God.
No comments:
Post a Comment